Update, update, update!
Ben and his friends have stopped their touchy-feely time (as far as I can tell from behind a closed door. Who knows? They could be gently stroking each others' legs) and have switched their midnight activity to "intellectual" conversation. The current topic up for discussion is poop.
Apparently, Ben wants to go to someone's dorm and poop in the urinal. Of course his friends are laughing their asses off at this idea, and it seems to have taken enough root in all of their feeble imaginations that they may actually act on it tonight.
One of Ben's main bros/lovers chimed in with the suggestion that they should all go to the dorms and walk into random bathrooms to find boys who are showering. The plan is to open the curtains on them. He didn't explain what happens after that part, but I think all three of them need signs that read "I LIKE LOOKING AT OTHER DUDES SHOWERING! I'M GAY, BUT AM STILL TOO INSECURE TO ADMIT IT, DESPITE GLARING EVIDENCE LIKE THIS! INSTEAD, I'M GOING TO KEEP INSULTING HOMOSEXUALS WHO HAVE COME OUT OF THE CLOSET!" in bright, neon letters.
Ben's newest suggestion (I'm trying to type this in real time) is to go to the college library to steal books that people need to use to study for finals, so that those people fail their finals. After that, Ben plans on selling the books back to the campus bookstore.
I don't think I can describe Ben in any terms clearer than this: Fucking. Douchetard.
Regardless of what occurs tonight - pooping in urinals, checking out naked freshmen dudes in the dorm showers, stealing library books, or staying here and being obnoxious and loud (Wow! Doing both things at the same time!) - it's going to annoy SOMEONE.
I'm hoping it's not me, or there may be blood. Or I'll at least piss on Ben's truck, since in tonight's weather, it will freeze.
Stupid bastards.
I need to get back to my homework. Enjoy.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment